Part of growing up is doing things you never thought you would
I never thought I’d move to Brooklyn.
Actually, I never thought that by the age of 24 I would move to the suburbs of NYC, with my boyfriend (hey–there are stop signs here). By choice.
Those are some big moves.
They are Life moves. They are moves that five years ago, I would have never thought I wanted.
Because, five years ago, I never imagined myself aching to get out of Manhattan. I never thought I’d see a day when I was filled with resistance each time that I walked outside my door. The smells, the sounds, the people — all of which I was so enamored by when I first arrived, changed in an instant.
Five years ago, I was the type of person who ran away from the idea of comfort. The idea of consistency. I couldn’t imagine when one person would be my constant, because they would make me feel electrified and complete at the very same time.
It all just seemed impossible.
Five years ago, I remember my mom telling me that her friend’s daughter moved to Brooklyn. She had a backyard and a big, ol’ apartment. And a dog and a boyfriend. She wanted that. She needed a recluse away from the bustle of her day-to-day.
“I could never,” I remember responding, laughing at this Poor Girl who gave up on the City. At the time, I really couldn’t imagine why anyone would want that. More importantly, I couldn’t imagine if I would…ever want that.
And, Here I am.
Here I am, sitting in my beautiful Brooklyn apartment with my boyfriend and my backyard and my nice, slow walk to work (no dog yet — too soon). And, I feel full. I feel complete. On most days, anyway.
It is everything I Never thought I would be.
And yet, I am still weird and confused and I change my mind about my dinner — let alone my career — every single day. I still have the urge to explore. And travel. And figure out my life, God Dammit.
But now, I feel a little bit wiser.
…Is that crazy? Realizing that you have gotten Wiser?
Maybe it’s more than just getting “wiser”. It’s realizing, truly, that you don’t know Everything. About yourself, about the world. That You can change; you will change. And moments and people and places change, too.
And, in a span of five years (or one year or ten years) — you may do things that you Never thought you would.
I think that’s one of the weirdest parts about growing up.
Because, as a young and naive and (seemingly) perceptive person, you think that you can predict the future. You think that you know Who you are going to be, and what job you want to have and who you’re going to marry.
When I was younger, my dad would famously repeat the wise words of Plato (his favorite Greek philosopher) at the dinner table:
“You only know what you don’t know.”
I thought that he just loved making us proud of our Famous Greek Ancestors — not teaching us a lesson.
With a little bit of Growing Up myself, I realized that my dad (and Plato, duh) were right. The only thing in life that you can count on is knowing what you don’t know.
Which is why, you will always find yourself doing things you Never thought you would.
It sucks, I know (that I truly know). We ache to predict the future. We want to know how long we have to wait for our Uber (8 minutes), what the #1 best taco truck is in Brooklyn (Chilios), and where all the Pokemon went (-__-).
We need all the information. We need to make the Best Possible Decision.
Because, We can.
But, realizing that you don’t know something, whether it’s the answer to a trivia question at the bar, or how to make your next career move — is scary. It’s something that most people actively ignore.
Which, in my humble opinion, really only gets you to one of two places: (1) Delayed dissatisfaction, or (2) Ignorance.
I am assuming that none of us want to be either (consciously at least).
So, let’s get comfortable with the unknown. Let’s allow ourselves to change and mold and grow. Because, it’s Our time to do it.
Your 20s don’t last forever.
Take this time to Say Yes to the random and weird. Because, you Never know where one (tiny) decision may lead.